Monday, March 30, 2015
Presenting AGAIN?!?
So, we definitely had a rough weekend, but we stayed busy and made it through. I told Barry that I really needed a situation to come in today to help me move on from that no. Two hours later, we had another good situation to look at. Within a few minutes of going over everything, we knew that if all our questions were answered the way we thought they would be, we would be ready to present to another expectant mommy. Turns out this one is with the agency that we joined already and the cost is a little less that the other so we would be able to use some for travel expenses too. Plus they already have our profile and home study so that should save us some time and hopefully put us toward the top of the stack. So, now we wait again.....
Just Another No...
So, after all the running around and waiting, we found out our answer was no. Friday was an awesome day to start out with. I went and got my nails done and then went and picked up a huge box of baby boy clothes that someone was selling for $60 (probably worth over $200). I got home and then started getting ready for work. Before this waiting period, I looked forward to the beep of my cell phone telling me that I had an email. Not anymore. We wanted a phone call this time with the news we had been hoping for.
But that call never came. Instead an email with the news telling us that she had chosen someone from the first group of profiles. At that point, a million questions go through your head...were we not good enough? why didn't she like us? did she even see our profile? I called Barry with the sad news and then had to go to work. The excitement that I had been feeling was not just a pit in my stomach. My boss asked if I needed to go home. NO, that would not be a good idea. Sit at home with the box of cute baby clothes I just bought? Sit there and think about what might have been? Nope, I needed to have a busy night at work to keep my mind off of that baby boy. But I made it and am doing much better now.
But that call never came. Instead an email with the news telling us that she had chosen someone from the first group of profiles. At that point, a million questions go through your head...were we not good enough? why didn't she like us? did she even see our profile? I called Barry with the sad news and then had to go to work. The excitement that I had been feeling was not just a pit in my stomach. My boss asked if I needed to go home. NO, that would not be a good idea. Sit at home with the box of cute baby clothes I just bought? Sit there and think about what might have been? Nope, I needed to have a busy night at work to keep my mind off of that baby boy. But I made it and am doing much better now.
Tuesday, March 24, 2015
The Waiting Game
So, that perfect situation from the previous post, not so impossible after all. We had pretty much given up on it all weekend. So sad, since it seemed perfect for us. Saturday morning we had gotten an email saying that they had enough profiles. We were out.
Monday morning we woke up to a message from our consultant saying that if the other lady had said we were in the second group to be presented to the mom, then we should get our profile sent in right away. We also finally got the answers to our questions. So we over nighted the profile and home study to the birth mother and her social worker. We talked with the bank and upped the loan to cover all of the expenses. And now the hardest part of all.......we wait. We wait to see if this young woman decides to allow us to parent her little boy. We know that there are others waiting for the same thing. That makes me sad. Now, where I once was excited to get an email in hopes it is the next situation, I cringe every time for fear that it is the dreaded no.
I remind myself daily that whatever is meant to be will be. But that is hard to believe all the time. I know that God has the perfect child for us out there somewhere. If it is this beautiful little man, we are excited to see him and bring him home to make him ours. If it is another beautiful child waiting for us, that is great too. Just hoping that the wait isn't too long either way.
Monday morning we woke up to a message from our consultant saying that if the other lady had said we were in the second group to be presented to the mom, then we should get our profile sent in right away. We also finally got the answers to our questions. So we over nighted the profile and home study to the birth mother and her social worker. We talked with the bank and upped the loan to cover all of the expenses. And now the hardest part of all.......we wait. We wait to see if this young woman decides to allow us to parent her little boy. We know that there are others waiting for the same thing. That makes me sad. Now, where I once was excited to get an email in hopes it is the next situation, I cringe every time for fear that it is the dreaded no.
I remind myself daily that whatever is meant to be will be. But that is hard to believe all the time. I know that God has the perfect child for us out there somewhere. If it is this beautiful little man, we are excited to see him and bring him home to make him ours. If it is another beautiful child waiting for us, that is great too. Just hoping that the wait isn't too long either way.
Saturday, March 21, 2015
Perfect Baby That Wasn't
So, yesterday we found out about a beautiful baby boy that we fell in love with the moment we saw him. He was born in December and his name started with a B, all signs to us that it was "meant to be." The only hurdle was that the monies needed were quite a bit higher than we had budgeted. But we knew that for the right baby we could pay more than our budget; we would make it happen. But we had questions, and no one to answer them. The other agency answered some but we were waiting to hear answers to our main questions still. We contacted our lender to see what we could do about raising the amount on our loan. We were waiting on a reply from them and then we could send off our profile to be seen by the birth mom. The other agency had sent a letter saying that she had some profiles already, but that we could be in the second batch.
So anyway, I got up this morning to an email from our consultant saying that they already had enough profiles. How in the heck did they get enough profiles in the 12 hours since I got the information? Maybe they are all right there near where the baby was born? No one gave us any other options of delivery other than mailing it overnight. I am baffled about how this works I guess.
Our consultant tells us that the first couple situations are to help us see how things work. But what if one of those situations that she sees as "practice" is the right one? This was the first situation that I saw being right for us. I am left feeling a little said and rejected. We didn't receive the help we thought we would.
So anyway, I got up this morning to an email from our consultant saying that they already had enough profiles. How in the heck did they get enough profiles in the 12 hours since I got the information? Maybe they are all right there near where the baby was born? No one gave us any other options of delivery other than mailing it overnight. I am baffled about how this works I guess.
Our consultant tells us that the first couple situations are to help us see how things work. But what if one of those situations that she sees as "practice" is the right one? This was the first situation that I saw being right for us. I am left feeling a little said and rejected. We didn't receive the help we thought we would.
Wednesday, March 4, 2015
Accepted, but feeling rejected!
Today I received an email from one of the agencies we applied to earlier this week. We are accepted and ready to receive situations. Hopefully this will raise the number of situations we will see. So far, we have only seen one situation.
And that brings me to the feeling rejected part. I feel bad that we have not gotten any other situations in the past two weeks. I feel like we should have seen something by now. I know I need to be patient and wait but that is way easier said than done.
The other thing that irritated me this week happened on Facebook. We recently started a gofundme page to help with the fundraising; to give friends and family the opportunity to help us bring home our baby. A friend that I met through work decided to share it on her page as well. Apparently, a friend of hers took that as the time to tell me off when it came to adoption. Apparently, she adopted through the foster care system where she did not have to "buy" her kid, as she seem to think we were doing. Plus she had the nerve to say we were begging people for money. I tried to educate her, but then decided she wasn't worth my time. The friend later got on there and blasted her for what she said, and it was later removed. It was nice to see that my friends stood up for me and encouraged me. Thanks to those who did. You know who you are.
And that brings me to the feeling rejected part. I feel bad that we have not gotten any other situations in the past two weeks. I feel like we should have seen something by now. I know I need to be patient and wait but that is way easier said than done.
The other thing that irritated me this week happened on Facebook. We recently started a gofundme page to help with the fundraising; to give friends and family the opportunity to help us bring home our baby. A friend that I met through work decided to share it on her page as well. Apparently, a friend of hers took that as the time to tell me off when it came to adoption. Apparently, she adopted through the foster care system where she did not have to "buy" her kid, as she seem to think we were doing. Plus she had the nerve to say we were begging people for money. I tried to educate her, but then decided she wasn't worth my time. The friend later got on there and blasted her for what she said, and it was later removed. It was nice to see that my friends stood up for me and encouraged me. Thanks to those who did. You know who you are.
Applying to adoption agencies!
So, this week we got two applications off to the adoption agencies. Ironically, they are both in Florida.
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